Quotes by Calvin Trillin

Anybody caught selling macrame in public should be dyed a natural color and hung out to dry. (Calvin Trillin)

As far as I'm concerned, "whom" is a word that was invented to make everyone sound like a butler. (Calvin Trillin)

Before I go out to take a picture of someone, I just stop at the city desk and say, Do you want him gazing out toward the sunset or picking his nose. (Calvin Trillin)

Health food makes me sick. (Calvin Trillin)

I don't care where I sit, as long as I get fed. (Calvin Trillin)

I never did very well in math - I could never seem to persuade the teacher that I hadn't meant my answers literally. (Calvin Trillin)

I never eat in a restaurant that's over a hundred feet off the ground and won't stand still. (Calvin Trillin)

In modern America, anyone who attempts to write satirically about the events of the day finds it difficult to concoct a situation so bizarre that it may not actually come to pass while the article is still on the presses. (Calvin Trillin)

Marriage is not merely sharing the fettucini, but sharing the burden of finding the fettucini restaurant in the first place. (Calvin Trillin)

Marriage is part of a sort of 50s revival package thats back in vogue along with neckties and naked ambition. (Calvin Trillin)